School is back! Which means sports is back! If you are like the average UBC student, you probably feel somewhat unconnected to the Thunderbirds varsity program (link to that article, but i don’t where it is). That stops now!
To be a good fan you should probably know what varsity sports you can go and cheer for. There’s hockey, football, golf, rugby, swimming, baseball, cross country and a bunch of other ones. There’s NOT bobsled, ringette, polo, marco? polo, Nascar or any sport that involves a gun (though we do have a club for that which you can join!). Pick whichever sport you played in middle school or whichever one has the most attractive players and get ready to cheer!
After you pick your new favourite sport, you’ll need some merch from the UBC bookstore. Want a T-birds hoodie? That’ll be $44.95. A T-birds baseball cap? $34.95. T-birds jacket? $79.95. Two T-bird sticks to bang together to make noise? $5.95 each, and you need two. After you spend an exorbitant amount of your student loan money on Thunderbirds swag, you can cry into your $24.95 stuffed Thunderbird. Don’t forget to get a map to find your way around Thunderbird Park.
Next is actually going to a game. It’s always easy to watch a game from home, but why do that when you can go see a game in person. Bring all the merchandise you bought, paint your face blue and do some vocal exercises to prepare for yelling. Learn some cool chants to pump up the team, like the UBC March. With lyrics like ‘You stand for aye, between the mountains and the sea; All through life’s way, we’ll sing “Kla-how-yah Varsity”’ it will really liven up the crowd!
If you're the kind of person who likes to watch sports at a sports bar, just make yourself feel like you're at a bar by getting drunk before a game. (Cheeky drunk, not throw up on the mascot drunk — stay safe people!). This way you’ll have the confidence to cheer and shout, or feel numb when the Thunderbirds lose. You’ll also feel better about having no clue that what’s going on.
When the game’s all done, tweet about how much you loved it and how you definitely won’t forget to go to next weekends games. Brag to all your friends about how you’re so connected with the campus. Show off all your selfies with the team and bask in the knowledge that you’re a better UBC student than most UBC students.
Happy sportin'!
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