“Dear Natalie,
I know of a friend who has the habit of buying books which she never bothers to read. Her room is totally like a library already but she keeps on stocking books even though it's clearly running out of space. Do you think she has a hoarding disorder?”
Sounds like an arts student.
In all seriousness, neither I nor you are your friend's physiologist. I'm not in any way a doctor. But if your friend feels pride rather than shame over their books, it's more likely they're a collector — even if a rather amateur one.
“Natalie,
Is it strange to think about Christmas when summer's not even over?”
If you're assuming that Michael Bublé’s Christmas album isn't in my “most played” playlist, you're assuming wrong.
“My girlfriend and I are relatively coy about sex. We try to steer clear of talking about the subject in detail, though we're fairly sexually active — mainly due to some degree of embarrassment talking about things that aren't necessarily ‘vanilla’ that we've noticed we both do during sex.
Last night, she asked me about whether I'm interested in fetish play, like bondage or DD/LG (daddy dom/little girl) play. I don't want to let her down by saying I'm not interested in that type of sex and am fairly open minded, but I'm concerned about what entering into this type of sex could lead to in our relationship. How do I go about balancing satisfying her needs and not letting her down?”
Assuming you mean “kinky bedroom play” when you say fetish and she doesn't have an actual bondage or DD/LG fetish, then check out Mojoupgrade.com.
Communicate. I know you're “coy,” but you need to communicate or you're both going to end up doing things you don't like because you think the other person likes it. Don't be afraid of doing something because of what it might lead to. Consent isn't something you give once — you should be giving it every step of the way.
If your word choice was intentional and bondage and DD/LG are your girlfriend’s fetish, you really, really need to communicate if you're not comfortable with it because someone is going to end up disappointed.
For those wondering — in very basic terms — a kink is a sexual want, a fetish is a sexual need.
“When is the best season to lose weight, especially when you're in university?”
The season where you have the motivation to lose weight. Seriously, it doesn't matter when you start as long as you start. Sign up for the Birdcoop and plan to go at least twice a week. Doesn't matter if you start now, in December, in March or in 2018, as long as you want to start.
Give yourself a goal, which can be anything. It doesn't have to be just a weight goal, it could be, “I want to be able to run for half an hour without sounding like an old-man smoker.” Then work your ass off. The feeling when you reach it is phenomenal.
“What is the best way to get over a heartbreak when you can't keep yourself busy all the time?”
Time.
“Is getting a ‘Standing Deferred’ gonna spoil your grade record?”
No, it just means you're completing your course outside the original course dates for an approved reason. Approved being the key word here. Talk to your professor or academic advisor if you want to discuss this further.
“How do you keep yourself from dozing off in the middle of reading your textbook?”
Naps. Well, naps, music and an interest in the topic — or at least an interest in doing well in the class. But mostly naps.
Need advice? Contact Natalie anonymously at asknatalie@ubyssey.ca or at ubyssey.ca/advice and have your questions answered!
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