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Ask Iman: AB-sence makes the heart grow fonder

Dear Iman,

I hate living in my city in Alberta and I'm moving to campus soon. How do I not feel guilty about leaving my family and moving on to better things?

Now that, my friends, is what we call a loaded question. The guilt of growing up and leaving the nest is tough. But of course, I can help you out.

If you asked me this question six months ago I would have had no answer for you. Like you, I hated living in my city in Alberta, was moving onto campus soon and of course, felt guilty about leaving my family (and friends) at home.

My advice is to keep your head up.

It’s scary to move away from home. Your loved ones are difficult to leave behind.

You absolutely should not feel guilty about wanting your independence. You have tons of people who love you at home. Your move is a new stage in life — not just for you, but for your parents, siblings, friends and others.

Moving out is hard. There are so many changes and stresses that come with it. But moving out is also one of the first steps of growing up. Though it may feel like you’re leaving your parents, siblings and friends in the dust, I can assure you that they’re happy for you, even if that means that they’ll see you less. I mean, absence does make the heart grow fonder!

Instead of dwelling on how much I’d miss everyone, I tried to spend my time with my family and friends in an effort to make some memories before I moved.

But of course, I couldn’t stop thinking about my move, how many new people I would meet, assignments I would forget to do and times I’d miss my bus stop, but that also comes with thinking about how much I’ll miss everyone back home.

Something to remember is that this is a fresh start, a new beginning — though it sucks to leave your loved ones, new experiences are worth it.

The separation will be tough at first — it was for me, but that’s just growing up!

Yes, they’ll miss you. And yes, you’ll miss them, too. But I promise you, there is nothing that tastes better than sweet, sweet, independence.

You’re doing great. Keep it up!

Need advice? Send your questions, queries or problems to advice@ubyssey.ca, or submit anonymously at ubyssey.ca/advice!