Words of wisdom for first-years: sex, love and relationships

In the pursuit of knowledge, The Ubyssey has compiled a series of wisdom nuggets from a panel of experts with the knowledge and experience on UBC to responsibly push their opinions on unsuspecting first-years.

From hot dates to study tips, these folks have been through the wringer and are almost out the other side. Without further ado, your virtual mentors:

Our esteemed panel of experts

John Harvey: Sixth-year engineer. A victory-lap engineering student with strong opinions about basically everything.

Mischa Milne: Fourth-year English major. Ron Swanson's #1 fan.

Jessica Hohner: Third-ish-year computer engineer. Once got in a fight with a pit bull and won.

Gurvir Sangha: Sixth-year international relations/accounting student. Personifies the day President Ono wore his first bow tie.

Afie Bozorgebrahimi: Fifth-year human geography major. Extremely tired but determined.

Aditya Jariwala: Third-year Sauderite in marketing and entrepreneurship. "I have a midterm in one hour, but I'm filling this out instead."

Sara Chitsaz: Third-year sociology major. Loves dogs, burritos and First Year Guides.

Joel Stadie: Third-year math major. Cannot say no to an adventure.

Katherine Kirst: Fourth-year international relations major. The person who says y'all a dozen times to cancel out any Canadian interjections she might have accidentally used. 

How to make friends

"Say yes to things — nothing that makes you uncomfortable, but try to push yourself to get out there, a bit. People are at peak friendliness for the first few weeks — hang out, make recurring plans." - John Harvey

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"If you're nervous to walk up to someone to say hi, the chances are they are feeling the same way. So step outside your comfort zone. The worst that can happen is you will know that you don't like the person. But at least you won't regret it." - Aditya Jariwala

Be yourself. Unless yourself is Regina George.

— Gurvir Sangha

"Be yourself. Unless yourself is Regina George. Don't be yourself then. No one likes Regina George." - Gurvir Sangha

"Go join a thing! There will be people at that thing and they'll talk to you!" - Jessica Hohner

Friends and romance

"University is a really good time to be figuring out what you like — this 100 per cent extends to sex and relationships. Have fun, go on lots of dates, meet cool people, hook up in weird places — be open-minded! You'll find that many people at UBC aren't looking to be in serious relationships, especially in the first couple years. But when you meet someone you like, and they like you, then it's awesome." - Mischa Milne

Have fun, go on lots of dates, meet cool people, hook up in weird places — be open-minded!

— Mischa Milne

"The best way to meet people is to join a lot of clubs. The people you meet already like the same things as you, and it gives you a chance to get to know them first in a casual setting without having to actually date them and then dump them when you realize they're a tool." - Jessica Hohner

"It never ceases to amaze me how few adults understand the concept of using your words. If you have a problem, or a question, or a concern, simply talk to your crush/partner/FWB - poor communication causes 90 per cent of unnecessary drama!" - Katherine Kirst

"Just cry it out boo." - Afie Bozorgebrahimi

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Homesickness

"Skype your parents regularly. Set a time. You'll both feel better if you keep each other up to date on everything." - John Harvey

"Spend time with friends! The more you are with others or the busier you are, the less homesick you'll be." - Aditya Jariwala

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[''] Photo courtesy Aditya Jariwala

"Don't feel like you're somehow less of an adult by feeling homesickness; you're human, of course you're going to miss the familiar, be it your family, friends, squad of dogs or bed. Keeping photos of everything that you love from back home in your dorm room works wonders — I keep a photo of my family right on my bed side table, so it's the first thing I see when I wake up, and the last thing I see when I go to bed." - Katherine Kirst

Finding the perfect roommate

"Much like pre-med, true love and the Lochness monster, the perfect roommate does not exist. You will bump heads from time to time. Accept that. Communication and setting expectations around cleanliness, volume, and guests (among other things) that you and your roomie(s) can abide by is the DJ-Khaled-approved key to success." - Gurvir Sangha

Find someone who you are comfortable with, but also someone who can respect your space.

— Sara Chitsaz

"I think the trick is to find someone who you are comfortable with, but also someone who can respect your space. My roommate is my best friend (and has been since first year), and we are at a point where we spend a lot of time together but are also okay with doing our own thing." - Sara Chitsaz

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[''] Photo courtesy Sara Chitsaz

"Be brutally honest about yourself when looking for a roommate — explicitly state your sleeping habits, how many piles of clothing you keep around the flat, what kind of music you blare to help you study and how often you wear pants at home. If you're able to find someone that jives with all of this, you've found the perfect roommate." - Katherine Kirst

Anything else?

"When it comes to having a social life, you get out what you put in." - Jessica Hohner

"Don't forget, your parents have done everything to get you to UBC. Not the cheapest university. The least you can do to make them happy is call them and talk to them as often as you can." - Aditya Jariwala

"Invest in a quality set of thank you cards and use them. I can't tell you how many professors and TAs remember who I am in a sea of faces because I always give them a thank you card at the end of every course." - Katherine Kirst

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[''] Photo courtesy Katherine Kirst

"Love yourself." - Joel Stadie

Interviews have been edited and condensed for clarity. If you found this helpful, check out our other entries in our "words of wisdom" series: managing schoolwork, getting involved and having fun.