Just because I don’t believe in climate change doesn’t mean I should fail EOSC

As we all know, human-based climate change is a lie made up by the Danish because they’re jealous of Canada’s oil deposits and space program. Everyone, it seems, except for the “experts” who’ve dedicated their lives to studying “science.”

My so-called EOSC prof is convinced that by some sort of magic, humans are making the earth warmer. What does she know? It snowed yesterday.

I am being discriminated against for my very correct views on the subject. Just because I shriek loudly every time the professor says “climate change” doesn’t mean that I should fail this class intended to teach me about the effects of climate change and pollution.

Aren’t I entitled to my own views? UBC is stifling the voices of their students and I demand that my super mean and ugly professor who wouldn’t go on a date with me should totally get fired.