The rumbling in your tummy, the gurgling of your bowels, the urge to take the biggest shit of your life consumes you and you don’t know where to go. Fear not my friend, for here are the nine best reasons why you should take your life-altering dookies at IKB.
In classic Ubyssey blog fashion, here is this year's AMS Elections bingo!
After listening to debate records and reading up on candidates’ platforms, you might still be left wondering who you want representing you on the Senate. Well, lucky for you, I put in the hard work and got my hands dirty to provide you with all the gritty deats you need to make your pick.
I asked the VP external candidate about what really matters. You know, to get a vibe.
You should know your rights, including the right to not vote.
I mean, would you trust someone who doesn’t love man’s best friend? I didn’t think so.
You've got the drill by now! We asked your VP administration candidates the questions that matter. If you’re looking for real facts, head over to the
Kamil Kanji is running uncontested for VP academic and university affairs this year, and after hearing how he cooks his eggs, we’re a bit scared to see what the future holds.
I know you are all at the edge of your seats, waiting to find out more about the fantastic candidates running for VP finance this year. These are intelligent individuals ready to make a difference and talk about the important things, like Justin Bieber and vicious kindergarteners.
Let’s be clear. This is not a place of earnest political discourse. If that is what you seek then look to the Ubyssey’s news section. Herein you will find exclusively fun facts, jokes, and online security information about your 2023 AMS presidential candidates.
Welcome to The Ubyssey's second cartoon caption contest!
It’s sweaty and full of bodily fluids. It’s dark, humid and has the scent of something that died a few days ago. It’s full of all kinds of hair and other unmentionables… it’s the Pit on a Wednesday evening.
It’s dark. You’re driving down University Boulevard, and the silence of your night-time drive is only fractured by the sweet lullabies of a crooning Taylor Swift filtering through your car stereo. It’s a perfect drive — too perfect. You speed up, delighted by the gentle purr of your car’s engine, when all of a sudden you see it: A flash of black. Then blue — that dreaded blue.
You’re lonely. I’m lonely. And that’s completely okay.
But the world is cruel. Instead of what should have been we have this — a tragedy of happenstance and clumsiness.