you know, I've always wanted to be an inanimate object
Search the Archive
- All
- News
- Culture
- Features
- Opinion
- Humour
- Science
- Sports
- Photo
- Guide
- Videos
- All magazines
- Magazine: Resolve
- Magazine: Seg Fault
- Magazine: Memory Leak
- Magazine: Redefine
- Magazine: System Failure
- Magazine: Ways Forward
- Magazine: Goes Around
- Magazine: Comes Around
- Magazine: Reclaim
- Magazine: Self
- All Spoofs
- Spoof: Mid Appétit
- Spoof: explain!
- Spoof: Girlbossmopolitan
- Spoof: NICE Magazine
- Spoof: The Main Maller
- Spoof: 2019 Spoof: Who?byssey
- Spoof: 2018 Spoof: Oh-No
- Spoof: 2017 Spoof: Breitbarf
I am not a philosopher.
The first time I brought my partner to my place, I asked them to wait outside my bedroom — I wanted to make sure that there was nothing inside that I didn’t want them to see.
“You do know that all female news readers are supposed to be slim, trendy and attention grabbers, right?”
New province, new school, new friends. This is all well and good but I’m still frustratingly the same.
The moment she woke up to loud gospel music blaring from the kitchen, she immediately groaned.
Deodorant is a cheap way to ensure you smell fresh so people are willing to sit next to you on the bus.
It’s a funny thing, to feel hollow.
Our minds are trained to believe that certain activities or feelings are attributed to men or women
If women could be all those things, why didn’t I want to be like them?
One morning when I was in Grade Five I woke up with a giant pimple on my left cheek.
Mystique and Villanelle each fight against a world that tries to limit their capabilities and desires. They inspired me to be brave by being myself.
Here are three boxes each of which i do not fully belong/ but I do not think of this as unfortunate.
I didn’t catcall women, brag about sexual conquests or demean people with names. So how could I be affected by toxic masculinity?
"I think mentorship means so much more between women when it’s covered with solidarity of knowing that it’s not just about those big issues that are often heavy and difficult, but it’s also about coming into these places with a sense of humour.”